Humans are a social creature, and as such are constantly looking for reassurance of their existence.  I’m alive, but does anyone else know I am?  This is the very question that drives people to take action.

A while ago I wrote about a friend asking me if he/she had been influential in my life, and if I would remember that person should he/she suddenly disappear.  That question sent me on a great mental journey from which I realized that a person who makes a difference in my life is one who shall forever be remembered.  From little things to big things, I’ll always remember who it was that encouraged me to try something new.

This brings me to my next topic, needy people.  All people are needy in their own way.  The constant need for attention, the need to feel loved, the need to socialize, these are all very common and understandable needs that I can easily wrap my mind around.

However, the one need I can’t quite understand is the need for the needy.  Constantly helping others attain their needs usually leaves no room for one’s own need, but what if my own needs are the needs of others? I find myself constantly associating with needy people.  People who have psychological, or even physical needs are the fuel of my thoughts.  A person with emotional damage needing someone to talk to, a person who’s self esteem needs a boost, a person who needs some computer help, I mentally crave the needy to address their needs by addressing my need to think on how best to solve their problem!

Looking back, I’ve realized that I have helped many people with their psychological and physical needs, but when they are no longer needy, I no longer needed them. I’m a user, and needy people are my enablers, much like a symbiotic relationship.

This leaves me wondering whether or not my quest for knowledge is a quest I continue for my own personal gain, or to better address the needs of others.  One and the same?  Its like microphone feedback in my head!  So which is it better to be, the needy or a needer of the needy?

Technorati Tags: Needer, Needs, Needy

Is the American dream still feasible in this modern era and sinking economy?
Why are Republicans laughing at a man who embodies the American dream?

Rudy Giuliani: "His (Obama's) rise is remarkable in its own right.
It's the kind of thing that can happen only in America."
(Laughter, applause)

Is it really that unheard of for someone to rise to the top from nothing?  When our own government is counting on maintaining the status quo, it’s time for change.  I really hope no one man’s dream is deferred in this nation.

A Dream Deferred
by Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore–
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over–
like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

Technorati Tags: American Dream, Langston Hughes, Obama, Rudy Giuliani

Focused on a single goal, he dashes towards his target.
Upon attaining his prize, he quickly affixes his gaze upon another.
Focused on a single goal, the world passed him by.

As the time flew, his prize collection grew.
As the sun set upon the ages, his body tired.

Focused on a single goal, he accomplished everything he wanted
but missed out on soo much more.

How does one decided when to give up an eternal quest in order to live in freedom?
When are accomplishments and goals just not enough?

A Sunday night stroll a few weeks ago helped solidify my thoughts on people in the world, and how I interact with them.  “All men are created equal,” is perhaps one of the most recognized phrases in American History, and while I am a firm believer of all people starting off as equals at birth, its obvious that they do not remain as such.

I don’t consider myself an elitist, but my life-long observations have lead me to the conclusion that some people are just more suited to succeed in life than others.  Some people are more deserving of opportunities and knowledge than others.  Some people are meant for leadership, while others are destined to eternally follow.

So what makes a person better at life than others? Choices.  People have the capacity to make their own choices in life.  Choices that can/will ultimately set forth events that will define who they are and where they belong in this word.  A person has the right to choose whether or not they will work hard in school, they choose to take risks, they choose to commit a crime or live on welfare.  Poor choices usually lead to a poor situation, and a lower status in this world.

Read more

Technorati Tags: Elitism, Observations, People

As a former member of the Star Wars Galaxies community, I was surprised to hear that one of our own has taken his life; Former Star Wars Galaxies Lead Gameplay Designer Jeff Freeman (39) is now one with The Force.

In the begining, Jeff’s work on Star Wars Galaxies: An Empire Divided was celebrated among many fans, especially those who choose the ‘Creature Handler’ profession within the game.  A profession which former Senior Producer of Star Wars Galaxies John Donham says Jeff devoted extra time on, during the weekend to prevent the class from being cut at launch.

However, In November 2005, through a post on his personnal blog, Jeff became known as the man responsible for Star Wars Galaxies’ New Game Enhancements, which alienated a large mass of the existing player base, and in turn Jeff was seen as the “bad guy” in this whole ordeal.  Although he wasn’t the single handed mastermind behind the NGE, the faceless enemy suddenly had a name and a face, and the alienated players began to voice their disgust and anger.  The Escapist wrote a brief piece on how Jeff handled the situation here.

Although Jeff is quoted by The Escapist as saying, “Because I spent almost six years working on SWG, and it kills me that the only people who liked it, hate me. Frequently for misinformed reasons,” a member of his family has stated that SWG and its disgruntled players played no role in Jeff’s suicide.

I myself was one of those players who, years ago, cast the blame upon Jeff and a few others at SOE for what happened to SWG, but never to the point of harassing him personally via message boards, e-mails, or even in person.  Afterall, it was just a game!  If anything, his role ,big or small, in the development/implementation the NGE into SWG actually allowed me to break free from my addiction to that game, and for that I am truly thankfull.  I spent many great hours enjoying the fruit of Jeff’s labor on SWG, and I know he will be missed by all.

I wish his family my condolences

Technorati Tags: Death, Jeff Freeman, MMO, Star Wars Galaxies